Speed Dating Tips: How to Control Your Emotion When Dating with Him or Her
Speed Dating Tips: How to Control Your Emotion When Dating with Him or Her
Speed dating is a great way to know new friends and maybe the one you love, but you have to be careful when you talk with him or her. We have to admit that sometimes getting angry can be a relief. But frequent anger can cause problems. If you act aggressively every time you encounter unpleasantness, you will quickly annoy your family and friends and become lonely. In addition to causing social problems, bad temper can affect a couple’s relationship and even negatively affect their mental health.
1. Emotion diary
Emotion diary is not an ordinary diary, it records the situation of self-emotion every day. That is, what happens every day, how I feel, and even some tiny feelings are to be recorded. This is what psychologists recommend for blunted emotions. It turns out that repression is not the solution to the problem.
Because you didn’t lose your temper at the time and restrained yourself, but the anger still existed, accumulated over time, and finally couldn’t hold it back. Once you vented it, it was like a volcano erupting, which was very terrifying. . This point must be especially noticed by the retarded type. As people say, Mr. So has a good temper, but when he gets angry, he can be very bad. This is the emotional characteristic of a retarded person. Therefore, emotional diary is an effective method for retarded people to control their emotions.
2. Suggestive conditioning
Autosuggestion is one of the effective ways to change your emotions. The basic approach is to send positive signals to yourself, so as to adjust your mentality and change your emotions. There are many specific hint methods.
For example, when you get up in the morning, you start to hint to yourself: I am in a good mood today! I am very happy today! I must do things well today! I must have good luck today! The subconscious mind accepts these signals. This will have a big impact on your mood throughout the day, enabling you to go about your work in a good mood and full of energy.
3. Exercise your body to relief the stress
According to psychologist Winslav, one of the best ways to relieve emotions is exercise. Because when people are depressed or angry, there will be some abnormal phenomena in their physiology, which can be brought back to their original state by means of exercise, such as running, playing ball, boxing, etc. When the physiology is restored, the emotions are naturally normal. Some companies use this method to eliminate employee dissatisfaction. For example, a company has specially arranged a room in which the mannequin of the company’s senior executive is placed. When employees are not satisfied with the senior executive, they can go to this room to scold the senior executive or beat and kick for a while. After venting, I felt balanced, and I went back to my post to continue working. This is the exercise to relieve emotions.
4. Listen to music to relief
Music has a strong emotional appeal, so it is also one of the effective ways to relieve emotions. For some people, listening to a piece of their favorite music when they’re in a bad mood can dissipate the frustration. Therefore, it is recommended that friends who like music may prepare a few boxes of their favorite tapes and keep them by their side. When they are in a bad mood, put a few songs to adjust their mood.
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5. Encourage yourself
Do the work for yourself. Managing aggression is a long-term job. Anger and aggression often come from frustrations and dissatisfaction experienced in life. You need to address these issues and gain better control over your emotions.
When things are getting worse, you need to receive psychotherapy. What troubles you in your daily life? Do you want to change jobs? Bad relationship between husband and wife? If you can’t do these reflections on your own, seek the help of a professional who can help you think through and teach you how to decipher and manage your emotions.
6. Don’t escape
Reservative or repressive people don’t directly vent their anger, because they think: “How can you lose your temper when angry and anger are things that shouldn’t happen?” So they try their best to suppress their anger. When some reserved people are unhappy, they leave the scene to avoid confrontation. When the anger on both sides has disappeared, calm down and talk about it. Most people might think this is a good way to control anger and avoid conflict, but it’s not. Because even if he didn’t say a word, he was still communicating, and his body and expression had already shown his attitude. Sometimes silence is more annoying than silence.
7. Attention regulation
Human attention is like the lens of a camera, the question is which part of the thing to focus the lens on. Things are good and bad in themselves, and it is joyful to be on the good side, and frustrating to be on the bad side. Examples of this can be seen everywhere in our daily life. The best way to control your attention is by asking questions, because when you ask a question, your brain will look for the answer, that is, you will get what you look for.
If the question you ask is: Why is this person so annoying? Then your attention will be looking for a reason to hate, regardless of whether the person is really annoying. Instead, ask: How is this person so good? Your attention will then be looking for good reasons. It is also a word from the other party.
When looking for a reason to hate, this sentence is a bad word, and it is not good-hearted; when looking for a reason for a good feeling, this sentence is a good word, a heartfelt word. You see, the difference is so big. The root cause is just one point, and that point is your attention. So, one of the most effective and easiest ways to change our emotions is to change our focus.
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8. Understand your own emotional state
]For us, the most instinctive and natural way to express anger is to show our aggression. Anger is actually a natural adaptive response to a threat; anger also triggers our more aggressive feelings and behaviors, allowing us to fight and defend ourselves. When we face a threat, a certain degree of anger is also us Necessary conditions for survival.
You must believe you are mature enough, you know that they are the windows to your heart and will tell you many subtle truths. You can stop repressing and let these emotions happen to you temporarily so that you can better manage yourself next time.
In Conclusion
When you get stressed and anxious, simple use of relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing and visualizing relaxing images, can help you calm down from an angry mood. There are plenty of books and videos out there that teach you relaxation techniques, and when you’ve learned them, you can use them in any situation.
If you’re facing your partner and you’re both angry, this is a good time for the two of you to learn to use relaxation techniques. Using a sense of humor to defuse your anger, or changing your circumstances, can also help you deal with your angry feelings.
