When you communicate with a girl, what are you most afraid of that will happen? Most boys will say that they are most afraid of the embarrassment of being in the cold. Once they are in the cold, they feel that the air is instantly frozen, and every minute and second is like living a year. At this moment, your heart must be full of anxiety: what to do when you are in the cold, it’s so embarrassing! Shouldn’t it be time to talk about topics of interest to her to ease the bad atmosphere.
1. How to ask questions.
Some people feel that the biggest difficulty is the opening. They don’t know what to say when they come up. After saying hello, they are cold. If you find it difficult to start, you can start by asking a question. However, you need to ask some nutritious topics, such as “what are you doing?”, “have you eaten?” and other questions are not used, you need to ask some questions that can guide the topic, for example, you can ask: What do you think is the biggest challenge in work where? Or, what are your future plans? This kind of question can lead her to talk about more topics with you
2. How to listen to her.
Some boys want to show off in front of the girl, so they brag in front of her, the girl can’t get in if she wants to interject, so she can only endure it and hope that the guy will finish blowing soon, if she is a bad-tempered girl, It may have exploded on the spot, leaving you with a mental crit.
When communicating with a girl, don’t patronize and talk about your glorious deeds, but also take into account the girl’s feelings and listen to her thoughts and opinions. At the same time, when you listen to her words, you can also collect some information about her, such as what are her preferences? How does she view you as a person? Who does she hate? Are her values the same as yours? You can use this information to discover new chat topics, and when you don’t know how to chat, you can continue to talk about these new topics.
Different people will have different opinions on things. You have to find out what unique opinions you have when you analyze things. For example, you say this: Knowing someone is like unwrapping a gift (clapping yourself with your hands), unwrapping it, and you don’t know what kind of surprise it will bring you until the gift is displayed naked in front of you.
The above sentence contains two pieces of information:
First, you say that knowing someone is like opening a gift, and then you pat yourself with your hand, implying that you are a gift, and that she should know you in a mood of anticipation;
Second, the word naked is very ambiguous. Whether it is just an adjective or has other meanings depends on everyone’s understanding.
4. Focus on one topic and talk more details.
Be sure to find a topic, don’t talk about it in general, it will feel like you are dealing with the other party and make some polite words. It will make people feel that you are just staying on a very shallow level, talking about topics that you both know more about, and you will feel as if you have met someone you know very well.
Many people have such experiences. When walking into an unfamiliar room or meeting with an unfamiliar person, the most common thing they say to themselves is: “How can I break the deadlock and hand in the friend?”
If you don’t have the desire to chat, and you just want to brush up on your sense of existence, then I advise you to shut up, I believe others will not be willing to ignore you. Therefore, in the process of talking, you should always be enthusiastic, you don’t need to be too much, just keep a certain degree of curiosity about other people’s topics. Only when people feel that you have the desire to chat, people will be willing to chat with you.
Therefore, why replies like “…”, “oh”, “hehe” are disgusting, you can understand? During the chat, avoid using these “negative words”! Instead, use words like “wow” and “wow”. People are most interested in themselves, and they will not refuse those who are interested in themselves!
6. Discover topics from the environment.
If you really don’t know how to chat at the time, and then cool off, you can discover new topics from your environment at the time. For example, if she has a very special bag, you can ask her: This bag is very special, where did you buy it? She told you that I bought it on Taobao. At this time, you can chat with her about online shopping, and you can also expand from online shopping to online romance and other topics.
Although the above chat skills can help you stop being in the cold, not everyone can use these skills effectively. In the final analysis, it is determined by your mentality. If you don’t have a correct mentality, no matter how good the skills are, it will be useless for you. If your mentality is not correct, you may be nervous in front of girls, worry about saying the wrong thing, worry about gains and losses, fear of doing wrong things, etc. , these phenomena will reduce your value.
