Why Many People Don’t Like Speed Dating or Blind Dating

Have you ever been forced to “blind date” or participate in a blind date? How do you feel?

Blind date is a problem that Chinese women often encounter. When you are old enough to get married to have your own children but you don’t even have a boyfriend, it will inevitably make many people treat you as a monster, so your family members and your parents will start urging you.

Under the banner of being considerate of you, I will introduce you to the understanding and development of various men with better conditions. But also because of this, many women hate blind dates. In China, for women, no matter how successful your career is, as long as you are not married and have no children at the right age, it is a shameful thing. This concept is still preserved. In the hearts of most people.

Many people are afraid of seeing strange people.

In fact, many speed dates are not initiated by women on their own initiative. They are introduced by family members. Therefore, because of family introductions, they have to sit with a man they have never met. It’s a bit too difficult to find a topic and don’t know what to say in the dating event. Relationship itself is a gradual matter. This kind of purposeful understanding inevitably makes people feel uncomfortable. Therefore, when they meet for the first time, everyone wears colored glasses to see each other. This is the first point that makes women dislike blind dates.

History of Blind dating

Blind dates are actually very historical in China, and the customs of blind dates vary from place to place. In some places, the man brings his parents or other relatives to the woman’s house to meet each other. After arriving at the woman’s house, the woman met them, and in order to appear to be educated, she also had to sit with them with bubble tea or something. This way of meeting will inevitably expose yourself to the eyes of many people, and also accept the scrutiny and observation of many people. I believe everyone will feel uncomfortable.

Women think it loses face

Second, one of the reasons why many women don’t like blind dates is because they feel that they don’t have face. In fact, this kind of thinking is wrong. Marriage or not is just a matter of personal choice. Many modern women hope that their marriage will be happy and happy, and they are unwilling to find someone to deal with the marriage, so they would rather live alone than two.

A Story about my mother

My mother is very keen on blind dates, but she didn’t go to blind dates, so she came to me for a blind date. She started working after college, and after finding a stable job for a period of time, the elders around felt like: The interim tasks seem to start, and then Begin to arrange blind dates intensively.

Because my mother was married at 28, she felt that she would marry me before I was 28, probably since I was 27, she started arranging blind dates. In the process of arranging a blind date.

Maybe my mother got married because of a blind date, so this is the only way she knows. She thinks that without a blind date before, it is impossible to have a happy and happy family now, so she thinks that this kind of blind date is both father and mother. However, getting to know each other on the premise of getting married is a very efficient way of getting to know each other.

The pressure is from my parents

I think my mother arranged a blind date. What makes me feel the most stressful is not to meet the boys. In fact, the process involves drinking a drink and chatting for an hour or two. But when I came back, my mother kept asking, as if she wanted to When asked if an answer is impossible, I feel very stressed.

Every time I meet other men, we spend a long time complaining about our parents’ behavior, and they may also have their own ideas. The reason why they come to blind date is because of their expectations of parents. He may also want to meet some of his parents’ expectations. In fact, he knows that he doesn’t really want to do this.

I sometimes see boys. If he doesn’t really want to come, he feels that he will come because he is quite obedient. He just doesn’t want to disappoint his parents. But we don’t want to disappoint our parents. We don’t want to disappoint ourselves. We don’t want to make ourselves uncomfortable to meet your expectations.

What do people think about speed dating

The people I serve, they are also under the pressure of speed dating, but they feel that blind dates are basically acceptable. Some people are also under pressure from their parents, but they are not arranged by their parents to seek this marriage and friendship service. , So he will be more willing in his mentality, because this is because he knows that he wants to do this, although the source of pressure may come from his parents. Some people really want to get married and want to get to know someone, so this kind of person doesn’t feel persecuted and is more willing.

I think the way of making friends like this kind of blind date actually has its advantages, that is, you can do some hard screenings faster, such as age, education, religion, family background, etc. Moreover, as customers, they have to pay, so they are more serious and serious about this matter. Compared with the general dating software, these objects have a certain economic level, are less likely to shoot and kill birds, and are more purposeful. Looking for a partner or object.

In Conclusion

How can I adjust my emotions and adjust to external reactions when I am unhappy due to external pressure or false expectations? What is the emotion behind it? In fact, it is the feeling of being neglected in the process, disrespect, blindly questioning the progress, and wrong expectation of the result. It also made me understand that the point is not to hate blind dates, but to hate the lack of freedom of limited choice, neglect of opinions, and disrespect for personal free will.

But in fact, blind dates are just one of the ways to meet people. There are different ways to make friends in the world: dating software, friend circle introduction, marriage service, group friendship, blind date, etc. These methods are neutral, and have advantages and disadvantages. , Depending on the context in which they were exposed, and each person’s suitable way of falling in love and establishing relationships is different.

Therefore, we don’t have to particularly hate or slander blind dates. On the contrary, we should understand the nature of the real hatred behind it? In my case, it is the feeling of being manipulated and manipulated. Taking Shirley as an example, it is a feeling of being ignored and not being respected.